Ciao twenty-ten.

So much and too much things that i wished to share but i'm just too lazy to update.
Few more days more,2010 wil comes to an end.
So much had happened and things around passes too fast like in fast forwarding mode.
I miss my old school friends and just wondering do they feel the same? :p
Ever since the spm results out,we've never meet each other till now.
Seriously miss those crazy times that we've been through together all this while.
N now everyone's busy with their own life and start moving on on different pathway.
Is wonderful where you can keep in contact with them till anytime and anywhere.
So,when do you guys free?
Mind sparing some of your precious time for your old friend here? :)

So much thing which happened on me actually made me a stronger person and get to learn how to see different things and peoples at different perspective.
I never know how to fight through fears until i failed at something.
I'm blessed and actually very lucky when get to know new friends which helped me to fight through all the tough situation in my life.
I do appreciate and love them.
They listen,understand and give advice,while i learn,forgive and forget.
Learn how to be more tough,more understandable,more optimistic and more fierce. lol?
I fight for rights but with teachers? *don't know how to survive when there's one more year for me to go*
*rolled eyes*

Been through happy and sad times.
But i appreciate every single moments.
Learn how to love people around you.
You'll never know what happen to tomorrow,only if you have super powers :D
So live your life and day with smiles :)))
*when you know your smiles might just make someone melt* :o

So much too write but seriously when a lazy bump starts to blog,you know they'll never write much :p

So,wish you guys a very advanced HAPPY NEW YEAR first :D

P.S : oh my dear loveable mummy,please let me escape from the house and countdown with my friends then i'll do all the house chores












for one day :p

Am lovin it.

Seriously did having fun during the deepavali holidays last week.
Me love deepavali.me love muruku.me love kambing.
What can i ask some more?
Seriously,love every single of my new form sixers friend.
We've been through all the difficulties together and i can seriously feel the bond between us getting stronger and stronger day by day.
We study hard together but play more hard together (:

Anyhow,good things doesn't last long.
Once my result is out i was like *bang head towards any concrete*
Just never gonna satisfied with my marks.
I hate it.Such a dumb.Such a waste.
Try harder?NAH.
Is never easy.
More hardworking?
Yeah babe,unless they ban facebook in m'sia.
*seriously wtf*

And omagosh,never met someone with such a sweet attitude in my life.
Just love it and seriously treasures it.
All i can see now is this person and is definitely not you but someone important.
LOL.
<3

Just gonna move on with life and as my friend said "Never Give Up" keep moving on.
Hell yeah babe.
Till thennn.

Guess I'm too stressed for the whole two weeks.
Darn exams!
I hate exams!
Two more papers to go which I'm already celebrating it already.
Though form6 is fun but it kills.
So best advice : Enrolled and start to accept the fact that you're going to be a nerd.
All kinds of bio facts were flying here and there on my brain.
Chemistry do kills me.
I tried to love maths but maths hates me *even the teacher hates me*,faith and destiny i guess..lmao.
Others are better to left unsaid.
Anywhat,i do appreciate this life.
ps.I FREAKING FALL SICK TWICE THIS MONTH.WTF.
Who cares.
Live life to fullest peeps.
Till then,xoxo.

10.10.10

A day to remember.
I love 101010.
I love you.
<3
XOXO :)

Dedicate to that very someone :D

I'm tired and sick of this.

I'M OUT OF THIS SHIT!

This blog is never dead!

Heyya! It's been *i don't know* how long but hey still I'm back!
Anywho,I'm too busy and lazy to post due to my new life.
But somehow,there's too much thing happening in between this this school holiday which gave a big effect on me.
It feels like hell when you just can't tell it out to anyone but to keep it to yourself.
I've did something really bad and cruel towards somebody and i'm seriously so sorry about it.
I seriously deeply dint mean it.
I'm sorry if i make you feel uncomfortable to be friends with.
I don't mind you to hate me for whatever I've did.
Yet,in between,there's more confusion that annoys me.
I don't know what that person thinks and what that person wants but i hope nothings gonna affect our relationship.
Seriously,it do hurts when you miss that somebody so badly but you can do nothing.
I hate this holiday! And, worse come to worse i start to feel sick on the second week of holiday which is also the week that I've planned to catch up with my homework!
DAMN .

I MISS YOU.

2010.

Things been so complicated lately and there's too much for me to list out one by one.
Been buzzing around with loads of hectic problems and is killing me.
But somehow,again i learn how to look at things more widely and think more wisely.

Form 6 life which I'm going through right now is seriously getting on my nerves.
For everything teacher taught and for what I've read from book,at the end of the lesson I'll be like 'ha?????'
Okayh that's so not making sense?But it's true.
No time for me to know more friends but only bunch of homework everyday waiting for me.
This mean that i'm the soon to be future nerd.Hot nerd *winkwink* LOL :D

Then,love?
I don't know.
Like seriously,i think i failed in this field.
No comment about that.
All i can said is,i do have a great time with you and for what we've gone through past few months,you really gave me a very unforgettable memories.
I'll never ask the one i love to stay when they've already made their decision to leave.
Never think of this to happen but *things are better to left unsaid* :)

Oh oh friends :)
All i know is,they always been there for me like no matter what.
Yeah,people said 'no matter how many friends you have for there to comfort you,but you still have to stand back up yourself to face the difficulties' ... WHICH i DON'T agree with that fact.
I need them and i definately love them.
Some of them who really gave me a shock is that they have this instinct where,when I'm down they'll automatically be there for me :)
Don't ask me how this phenomena happen :p
Ask them *teehee*
Millions of thank you for YOU,to brighten up my day.
I serious do appreciate it :D

Wo Ai Ni :)

The one I adore,admire and love the most,
My dear Mummy!
I Love You SO MUCH :)
I knew we have like loads of arguments everyday but still i love u lot.
For everything you said and do is for my own good.
Thks for helping me and supporting me in anyways :D
I'm sorry for certain mistakes or things that I've done that make you disappointed.
I'LL TRY MY VERY BEST TO MAKE IT UP FOR YOU KAY? :)))
Stay hot,preety,healthy and most of it,young kayh? :)
Happy Mother's Day my HAWTTT Mummy :D

*PS: sorry la mi,now kinda broke la.So,not really sure can get you the things that you ask for :p*

I wish.

-Love is just a word,Until you find someone to give it a definition-

Truly saying,my happiness isn't complete without YOU by my side.
No matter how much you give out and sacrifice,i do give and do the same thing too.

It's just that you don't and never try to realize.

Thinking back the old time was fun and happy for me.
I rather not waking up from my dream when the reality are so much worse than my dream.
Rain just pour in my heart and they're washing those unhappiness moment away that I've kept for so long.
I've choosed you for a strong and deep reason and for now I'm still trying my very best to hold it because you said 'you'll never let a person go no matter what happen because u love em a lot'.
Imma gonna follow and listen for what you've said since i do love you but I'm not gonna hold it when i know i don't have the ability to hold it anymore.
Both of our happiness counts.

I thought u're the song owner.

Once on the video just now.
The first song they start to play is a song which i miss it a lot.
Meant quite lot of things to me.
Just bring back some memories.

Just So You Know-Jesse McCartney

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

And I don't know
How to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know
How to make a feeling stop

Just so you know
This feeling's takin' control
Of me and I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now

Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go
Of you but I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know

It's gettin' hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other away

And I don't know
How to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know
How to make a feeling stop

Just so you know
This feeling's takin' control
Of me and I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now

Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go
Of you but I don't want to
I just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know

This emptiness is killin' me
And I'm wonderin' why I've waited so long
Lookin' back I realize it was always there
Just never spoken

I'm waitin' here
Been waitin' here

Just so you know
This feeling's takin' control
Of me and I can't help it
I won't sit around
I can't let him win now

Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go
Of you but I don't want to
Just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know, just so you know

Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go
Of you but I don't want to
Just gotta say it all before I go
Just so you know, just so you know

Is like sudden flashback.
Anyways,nice song though (:

Current Track : Break Your Heart by Taio Cruz

Now listen to me baby
Before I love and leave ya

They call me heart breaker
I don't wanna deceive ya

If you fall for me
I'm not easy to please
Imma tear you apart
Told you from the start,
Baby from the start.

I'm naive enough to fall for your trap.
You just stab my heart and never mend it back,you just leave it like that.
But i never once regret because you're once very sweet and you
gave me loads of happy and unforgettable moments.

I know you're not easy to please,
you've told me you're not a gentleman but somehow i still love you.
I'll still tell and explain to you how i feel although you start to tear my heart.
Though i know u wont care,
i still do sit here and tel because i love you.
But now,i'm tired.

I give up.

This is how much i love you.

Current track : Nothin' On You by B.O.B

No matter how strong a person is,they will still fall when something triggers their weakest part.
Like some superhero with their super power,they can be as strong as a gigantic giant.But somehow,they'll still fall because every human have their own ability and limits.

I've used up 3 years plus to train myself and made up my mind to be a strong and tough person in every way included my love life.I've realized if a person wants to take their revenge,they'll never care and not afraid to hurt their opponents a not.Is all because their aim is to beat down their enemies to show how strong and tough they are.They take their revenge to make things fair.It is perfectly true for what comes around goes around.But when it comes to a relationship,everything will be upside down.

The world is not fair when comes to love.Someone might hurt and the other might not or maybe both way will be hurt.And for most of the situation that I've seen and gone through,thru myself is that,boys will normally let the girl win when it comes to an arguments.And most of it is true because a gentleman will never want to make a girl sad and emo or even seeing their own love one cry.People said,a guy who cause a girl cry oftenly means that guy is a total failure.

This is due to,girls tears is the most precious thing that they ever had.Which girl will like to cry everyday instead of smile and be happy all the time?They want and need the most love from their other part exclude family.Woman is the most sensitive creature that God have ever created.That's why their all complicated in their own ways.They will sense things faster than any guys do.They put things very seriously and when they love that someone so much they will not even know what does happiness meant because they don't mind sacrificing it when they know their love one's is happy.

Different girl different attitude.My actual attitude is that I'm very sensitive,I'm tough because i have to.I'll really put myself into that someone if i really do love him a lot.I don't mind changing myself to suit him.I rather to keep it to myself when i did something like caring or sacrifice anything just for him and not to tell it out loud so that I'll get any rewards or something.I'm not that kind of person who can show my love with all those sweet talks,I'm sorry I'm not perfect.But when u really get to know me clearly,you'll slowly realized for every small things i do like even my small advice on your daily life is how i show my love and caring towards him.Maybe you still haven't get to see clear at my point of view but i deeply hope that you will ever just leave your stubborness aside and try to understand me from A-Z again right now.If you can't,there's no point for me to express all my feelings over and over again.

I cried because i care,all girls are weak,even when they say their tough,you'll know their crapping.For you,you're totally the one i want and need at the very first place.As time passes by,things change and you've change.I never blame u since u said I'm the one cause it all to happen.But although u don't know whats the reason i ask u to work and college is okay.As long as i know what i do will lead you to a bright future then I'm happy.

You're really different compared to other guys but still the special attitude of yours are getting more weird and is so not like you anymore.U said you're not gentleman ever since the first day i met you.Allright,i said okay and don't mind and now I'm suffering with your strange attitude.I know i cause it all and i don't need you to pity,anyway i knew u don't also.You're so much way different now until you said i never care for u.It's okay if you don't realized,I'm not going to blame u.But worse come to worse,most of the things you did and say nowadays,okay i know i created all and i myself make you never spend time with me but with that I'm getting weaker and weaker.When i cry,u don't even bother,you can still ask what for i cry.The most hurting,i asked you whether "you're afraid to hurt me a not?" ,you answered "nope".

Which girl will still talk to that guy when he answered that.She'll never give a shit about him anymore kay?! Which girl will still sit here and admit everything she did is her fault?! Which girl will still point out his mistake and hope he'll treat her better although he already hurt her to the highest limit?! Which girl will still try to tolerate everything when she has already at the dead end?! You said whatever i said is totally a copy of you last time.Why?Because I want you to know how i feel and how much is my love for you.I need you to understand me just for once.Seriously,you don't know how much i love you.I love you till i let all this to happen,and i really don't know what to do now.I should hate you instead of loving you and tolerate things now when you tell me you're not afraid to hurt me no more.But I can't because I'm stupidly crazily locked myself to you and I really don't know where I've put the key.Somehow,i need you to realized that,there's a padlock in you're heart.Hope you learn how to appreciate it.If not it'll rust and i don't know what will happen to it anymore.

Guardian much.

I don't know what I've did to deserve this respond from him but,
his always been there for me no matter what.
His like my,guardian for most of the thing.
When i need any help than the next thing i know is he will be there
for me.
Always do.
But now,things change,world change and peoples change.
And so i thought he wont but he changed too.
When i'm down,his always there to give me advice and comfort me.
I just dont understand that how can he be gone in like one night.
His no longer there for me due to some unacceptable reason *for my opinion la*.
I seriously dont want to loose a friend like this but i cant control things.
I have no right to do that.
All i hope is he'll know how to respond against me and hope he'll
understand that i'll always believe in myself when there's more people to guide me.
And sometimes when you think you have make the right decision,
please do think also whether how the person will feel after the decision have made.
You never give me a chance to even explain or maybe a goodbye before you leave.
Like u said,the path that i'm facing,will be more deeper and cooler.
Somehow,sorry if i've hurt you or offended your feelings earlier but somehow,
i'll still love to say Thank You for being there for me all the time.

And i'll always be there.

I must admit you were not apart of my book,
but now if you open it up and take a look,
You're the beginning and the end of every chapter.

-by:ne-yo-

It's been one month we've been together and I
do appreciate for every second being with you.
I love u for u,i have to admit you have always been
there to cheer me up :)

Happy 1st Month Anniversary Sweetheart!

I Love You So Much,Julian Yap :D

And they live happily ever after?

I don't know why just feel like blogging right now.
Is 2:o9 on April 12 now.
Am not tired or sleepy either right now,feels like talking and express my thought and feelings to someone but none are awake now.
I always realized other than twitter,i always love to express my feelings here :)
*sighing* What do forever means? For my own opinion,i don't think forever existed until you're really lock to someones heart and that's forever :D
But,for youngster like us,forever don't exist.
How about love?Trust,believes,freedom,understand?Some more?
I'm from a strict family which cannot really open my relationship to public to prevent my family members to know and he should know that.
By now,i don't really know whether i really know him a not,is not that i don't believe in him because i never want to blame him.Its me,i don't trust myself,i don't give my trust towards him.
My weakness,which is getting jealous easily always break me down when i see my love one close with others.
I hate it.And for some small reason we always fight and at last he'll try letting me win and eventually i feel like a loser in the next second.
Loving a person too much will leads us to an arguments?Is that even possible to happen in the first place? *confuse?*
Furthermore,at sometimes,i mean most of the time,i always try to prove how much i care and love him but I'll still never gonna beat the expectation that he expected from me.
I never thought I'll gone through this kind of situation.
For everything i did for him and only him,he'll never know how much i sacrifice,maybe he does but sometimes he'll say that I'm wrong and prove it to me one by one.
I do hurt when that happens but so?
No one can feel my pain except myself.
When he said i kept secret away from him,it hurts me more because that will be the last thing i do on earth.
I'm not the lying kind of person and i hate liars and his my boyfriend,there will be no way for me to lie to him but he said i did.
I cant and wont fight back to avoid arguments.
Distance and time is already my barriers between me and him.With that,our bridge start to be not stable and is not that strong anymore compared to last time.
I do love him,care bout him and his my precious.I always tell him i don't know how to describe my love for him,but i don't think he get what I'm trying to say.
I love him for him and its him.
There is no way a girl sitting infront of the monitor in the middle of the night to express how much she loves him.
I hope he could understand my heart.
There's too much confusion in my head now and it's killing me for me to think about it.
Strange feelings which stuck at my heart still haven't go away yet.
When I'm depressed,i always keep it in my heart and let it out by flowing my tears and when i'm happy,i'll say it out and share with everyone :)
Anyways,if there's something u kept in your heart and you think it'll hurt me,I'll prefer you to let it all out instead of keeping it to yourself just that you're afraid that u might or will hurt me.
I do cherish every moments that we've been through.I love u and i want u to know that.

ps: i'm still strong enough to go through all this hurting words which might hurt me :/ dont forget i'm strong! :p

Out of topic :)

Sorry,it's been kinda busy,i mean lazy to update my blog ever since the very last post.
Due to my lazy-ness,without me realized I've actually abandoned my blog for like two months.
Proud enough? *i do :)*
Too much things had happened since my last post.
I've been through bitter and sweet at the same time.
You'll never know how i feel because you are not me! *teehee :D *
Anywho,I'm lazy to list out what happened .
Its like first,got my results on march and it sucks!
Told myself i know i dint do really good in it.I dint put that much effort on it and eventually i've screwed everything *TADA much?* *hmmm :(*
Then,mum planned,PLANNED,to send me to Taylor's and I've been for the Open Day.
It's quite fun and excited to know that I'm going to study there.But god knows,suddenly after came back from Open Day,aunt came to my house and gave both me and my mum advice and end up,choices have made by my mum.Which is,send me to FORM 6!!!
FORM 6 weyh,is like friggin hard,and I'm effing serious I'm going to Form6.
Most of my friend told me to wait for letters from the ministry but schools starting around May!
And I'm still here waiting for letters and my ex principal said she cant do much and asked us to wait for letters??!
If i don't managed to get in to form6,imma serious DEAD!All my hard plan just damage in 1 day *snifffffsssssss*
Oh :) then,accidentally bang people car few days ago.No comments are allowed! So far after getting my license,accidentally TER-BANG.Skali saja ma..no big deal right?But still,there's one thing i dont like which is that woman so lansi,after bang already STILL try to snap a picture of my car and her car to compared or show to her friend how strong is my SLK *small little kancil* and how week is her old saga (: ,idk but anywhat,guess what my kancil no problem but her saga bumper go senget *woops* :p

And about my relationship,can be said kinda screwed up since februuaaarrayyy :o
Is like because of one's happiness then runes the other people happiness. * don't understand?*
Mmmmm,sometimes i do admit my relationship was kinda messed up.Like serious messed.
And for some decision I've made and done,I'll learn my lesson from that AND the same mistakes I've did,will never be repeated.
I've hurt a lot of people and while doing that,my heart do bleeds too.
I don't know whether I've made the right choice anot but I've already made it and there's no way for me to turn back.
All i have to do is just continue my life and that's all :)
Sometimes i really confused about the love thingy.Diff people diff attitude and character and yeah,it does gave me a lot of experience but at the same time,i DO HAVE TO sacrifice to understand their attitude.
No matter how experienced one person is,you will still go through some bad or down moments in a relationship and that is where one of them became stronger and fight back.
And what,we should trust each other in a relationship?Bullshit!No matter how much effort of trust and caring we put on,problems will appear when the time comes.
A girl like me which normally have mood swings all the time will always fight for small problem.I'll still gonna to have arguments with my love one no matter how much we love each other.
Because fight doesn't mean that we hate each other,so yea.Anyways,i don't know what am i crapping right now in the middle of the night but for some reason if u try to understand what am i trying to say,it kinda make sense allright? *winkwink* :D
My point is,I'm with this guy now.We've sort of been through quite loads of things and i do appreciate him a lot.But for some reasons,is not that i don't trust him.Is just that i don't trust myself and i always find topic and fight with him.I don't know whether is who's fault but no matter what we always tried to solve it and we've made it most of the time so yea. P.S : iloveyouloadsjul (:

Tired of reading?No worries,is the end of my post now.U think i not tired typing and thinking ah?Nyahaha ;)
XOXO.

I dont know.

Current track : Knock You Down by Keri Hilson

"I never thought I'd, hear myself say, ooh, ya'll gon' head
I think I'm gonna kick it wit my girl today, kick it wit my girl today
I used to be commander and chief
Of my pimp ship flyin' high, flyin' high)
Til I met this pretty little missile that shot me out the sky
Hey, now I'm crashing, don't know how it happened
But I know it feels so damn good
Said if I could back, and make it happen faster
Don't you know I would baby if I could
Miss Independent, ohh, to the fullest, the load never too much
She helpin' me pull it
She shot the bullet that ended that life
I swear to you the pimp in me just died tonight
Girl sometimes love"

I just love this part.Don't ask why because i'll not tel u!
Secret are meant to be secret arent them? :p

*thinkthinkthink*
too much things happen this few days or maybe can be said weeks.
just don't know how to desribe lar.
i promise myself to never post or set any of my status with emo stuff.
because some people might,MIGHT,find it irritating.
although i've promised it but i'm not sure whether i can keep it anot but who cares!
anywho,so yea,imma gonna stop that rubbish now.
i'm a person which dont and HATE hurting peoples feelins but i think i've did it to someone but i really dint mean it.
it feels really bad when u did that because when that someone treat u like THISSSSSSSS GGGGGGOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD,u will eventually feel THHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS BBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD after hurt them!!!!!!!!!!!!
*arghghghgh*
but in people who knows me,they will know for everything i make and made,it is based on a reason.
so yea,been feel bad all the time and i'm gonna control myself not to.
last sorry.


anyways,feel so bored and useless stayin at home some more new year coming and it's like so busy for me.
got to help my mum do house chores like mad fella *nvm,exaggerating it only* (:
what to do,good good girl must help (:
DAMN! i sounded so...so not mehhh!!!!!!!!
teeehheeee :D


anywhat i know danial you keep follow my blog all the time.
know u'll gonna read everything i wrote here..
haha...
i saw u're post about the white kancil.
*laughoutloud*
i know lar dei my WHITE KANCIL cunted huh?
no need to jealous.
EVERYONE NO NEED TO JEALOUS BECAUSE I CAN DRIVE WITH MY *aww* WHITE KANCIL ((((:
*proudnesswhichcanneverdescribe*

will post more everyone (:
ciaoxx :)
XOXO.

Is just another ordinary day.

Actually dont know what to write.
Life's gettin sucker by stayin at home without doing anything.
My dearrrrrr mum keep askin me to help her...
In other way,it can be said that i'm like already 50% housewife.
Hello..teenager here weyh!!
Have to go out have fun and all but yerrr !!!
She dont let me out!
I'm like a bird without wings on it :p
No freedom and now all thks to dont know wtheck happen to my car..
I got this phobia to drive right now.
That night my car sudenly go blackout at the housing area *sumore near hannah house//damn embarassing!*
Then until now,havent really go and fix it yet.
That's why i'm afraid to drive on the main road/highway.
Later sudenly engine spoil in the middle of the road...*not imagining*..gone case la.. :p
Okayh..thats why i'm so bored at here bloggin.
Everyone started their coll life and i..hah hah..so much of house chores like waiting for me.
I'm like a housemaid now..*call me lah if need a maid..lol..1 hr 500 bucks* (:
Teehee (:

Oh,something that i shoulnt forget is like..
I've been so "emo" for last few days which cause me to have mood swing which is quiet scary.
If i'm happy i'll joke with my friend then out of nowhere when they said sumtin wrong,like really minor prob,i go crazy.
Like serious crazy and maybe i screwed them or by ignoring them.
Dont u think thats scary?
But although i'm down for a few days,it makes me realises that actually there is still more people who is willing to cheer me up.
I'm glad and felt touch by what they did to me.
I never thought that a girl like me will be appreciated by others (:
Loads of love from me to you all.
I'll never forget the advice that had gave by u all and which i've accepted it.
Thks :D

Till then :)
XOXO.

I feel like this blog is gettin more n more emo-ness stuff.
I just dont know why i love to let it out here.
Argh *sigh-ing*
Current track : According to me by Miss Orianthi.
Currently facin supa shitty mood now.
Is it like stayin at home for so long doing ntg and spendin too much attention on the love one?
I thought normally thats a good thing but?
But now turn's like as though i'm very irritatin.
*wtfisgoinonhere*
*carinnlovingnspendinmymaxtimewithhimalsogotproblem?!*
Tell me lah kay,what to do now?
I just need to feel appreciated.
I want U to know how much things that i did and sacrifice to make u happy and to see u.
*iloveyouliketothemaxisthatwrongtoo*
Hope that u realised how i feel.
*thissupaolidayislikeshit*

Silent nite

I'm sad u noe tiz few days!Argh..dun ask why..i feel that every night i feel like cryin n eventually i'll sleep with my tears on.I hate myself.Everythins screwed!I hate it i hate it i hate it!Why cant i just be happy for a freakin days?!?I'm sucha a useless bein jealous everytym and i'm always bein not satiesfied when there's something for me to apreciate.I always look on the bad side but how about the good side.I always missed it.Feel so stupid.I hate myself.I hate bein sad.I hate cryin.I hate tears flowin!Can u now feel how depressed i am in the middle of the nite.It doesnt really matter coz i just wanna let my stress out.I just dont know how to express it out.So i prefer to type since i'm not able to shout it out loud right now.*tears flowin*.I just hate myself.Useless me!I'm sorry for hurtin u if i did.Just leave me behind if i'm bein such a irritate or burden for u all the time :(

Time Machine

Actually for me rite now,i rily have nothin much to post at blogger anymore.
Everyone's updatin deir blog bout new years n stuff...
So hahaha...it seems like every1 updatin d same thing thn i'm nt gona post it :)

Anywho ...
Just wish that i'm gona to get a time machine for my birthday *remind-ing~ DUH! :p*
HAHAHAHAHA XD
Ok,coz after d 01012010...
I just feel that i'm sorta lost!
Coz seeing my siblings packin all deir stuff for the 1st day of school n i'm like 'how bout me? :('
I WANNA BACK TO SCHOOL!!!
*nt include the takin exam part//pmr//spm*
*puke puke puke*
Hahahaha...sakai giler!
Kesimpulannya....saya mau skola!
Juz doin nothing at home everyday...u noe NOTHING??!
Argh ;/ and parents everyday like 'oi,go find college lar...dun wait till get ur results oni find..tat will be too late'...
ITU I PUN TAU LAR...
Apa mau buat...so malas... :D
I juz duno y,feel like no more school life for me n wana go for a relax n now every1 startin for college...wtf?
So fast u guys wana study ah??

Haaahhahahaha ;D
Maybe tat is just wat i think about and maybe diff for u guys but I'M STILL BORED!
Miss school life alotttttt...like hell lot!
Miss spendin time with frens,prefect job,time durin in the class,d way we complain bout teacher,d sarcastic singam...hahaha!
N i actually ask my siblings wat happen in school today n blablabla...
N dey wil like 'eh,u no more skul ady lah...ish...ntg hapen lah...!'
=.=
As though la rily non-of-my-business although it is d fact but still....i'm d ex student rite...although sudah past tense..hehehe!
Ala....bosan sial kat umah!

Owh...just wish tat i can back to school..
ohoh *exclude daisy* :)
hahaha...everyday me n gloria go toilet sure kena from her..so this train glo 2 b vr alert everytime.
Hahahaha..
She'll be like 'Flower in-coming...flower in'coming..run!'...hahahaha.

So..i'll neva 4get my life at secondary school...
Owh btw,hunny ariel...u're goin 2 leave me so fast?!
Argh!
Gona miss u loads.
:)

Kayh,will upload more soon..
Till then.
XOXO.